I remember being very overweight and NOT wanting to walk into a crowded room. Not wanting anyone to look at me and see how uncomfortable I was in my own skin. Not wanting them to look at me and judge me for how big I was. Not wanting them to see me struggle to walk across the room and to see how difficult it was to catch my breath. All I wanted was to blend into the crowd but how could I when I stood out SO much?
Fast forward 10 years to present day. Now I am the person staring….
I can not help it. I stare when I see a heavy person approaching. I watch them struggle to cross the room as they try to catch their breath. I watch their faces and know how uncomfortable they feel. I watch as they try to blend in. And I watch the others that stare at them. I join the others that stare but I am not one of them….
I stare because I understand. I stare at my old self, I know who you are, I know your struggles, I am your sister. I stare because I can not walk over and give them a hug. I stare because I want them to stare back and see there is hope.