Netflix Cobra Kai season 3 is out tomorrow, January 1st! What a great way to ring in the new year some some kick-ass entertainment! I received a screener of the new season, I will have my review up soon, so be sure to check back, it will be linked down below. In the meantime, I took down a bunch of quotes from the new series! I love me a good line and this show has some kick-ass ones!! Check out this HUGE list of 150+ kick-ass Cobra Kai season 3 quotes!
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Cobra Kai Season 3 Quotes
It’s karate time.
I thought karate died out in the 80’s.
You are at a bar, people don’t give a s*&^ about weather reports and some coma kid.
What about that neckbread teacher that attacked all the kids?!
We have a new initiative called ‘Hugs Not Kicks.” It’s like DARE but it actually works.
That look infected?
Guess the garbage doesn’t fall far from the truck.
I’m not a doctor, but after 2 weeks in a coma, the coma usually wins.
This security isn’t enough to protect your scrawny a**.
I got something on my computer you got to see. And don’t worry, it’s not porno this time.
It’s different when you are a girl. I mean even when you win, your not cool or tough. They think you are crazy.
I thought we were the good guys?
Hey buddy, sorry I haven’t been here, your mom doesn’t want me around.
You know what they say, there’s no such thing as a bad student.
That little bastard kicked your a**, more than once.
I broke my head, what do you want?
They are the opponent, you don’t show them mercy.
Life isn’t always fair. Sometimes the world can be cruel. That’s why you have to learn to be cruel yourselves.
We will strike back and we will strike hard.
I’m not check in. I’m no quitter.
Great Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumba**.
He likes to eat, Clarence.
A true Cobra feels no sympathy for its meals.
If you had a man instead of a boy, maybe things would be easier for you. You wouldn’t have to worry about rent.
What the hell, you listen to him and not me?
Tango and Cash were narcotics detectives. It’s totally different.
They wouldn’t talk so we had to smack them around a bit.
Easy lead foot, just follow him.
I shoulda known better than to team up with a lunatic like you.
Yeah, you’re some great teacher. Look what happened to Robby.
What are you her grandpa or something?
I got into a fight with a paper towel dispenser.
The doctor told my mom I might not walk again.
I did what you taught me. I showed mercy. Why did this happen to me?
Sorry you’ve been stuck cleaning up my mess.
We all mistakes, Robby. You can learn from your mistakes and I can help you with that.
That issue I was having, it got worked out.
I’ll be coming back a hero.
They think that they’re the hero and you’re the villain.
There is no good, there is no bad. Only weak and strong.
Sucks you can’t get laid anymore, man.
So, your wang can still get tang? Nice.
You do the right thing cause it’s the right thing to do.
No one wants to do business with a bully.
What makes your crap any better than my crap?
How’s that karate thing going, huh?
Easy there, Rocko.
You got nothing to give because you are a loser, like your father.
Failure, it never tastes good.
You want to play the violin on the Titanic?
He’s not coming. I knew it.
Cobra Kais never stop training. We have to catch up.
I am ready to add a few new moves to my repertoire.
In Japan, you can always visit someone. They speak to us, even when they’re gone.
If your mind is agile, so are you.
My popularity is on the rise while yours is steadily declining.
I shouldn’t be surprised since you enjoy pissing so much.
I shouldn’t be surprised you chose Miguel over me again.
They think we are doormats, lets prove them wrong.
I guess that’s why the Europeans call it foot ball.
You were the best Johnny and you an teach that to these kids.
Go anywhere near Miguel or his family, and I’ll kill you.
One good thing came out of our time apart, I got to fall in love with you, twice in one lifetime.
He’s a guiding light to me. I’m very proud for the man he has become.
I never thought I would have a family again. Daniel-san has welcomed me into his family.
Samanthan makes me feel like I am her tanmee (grandfather).
In life, we always lose our way. But it is people, not the signs, that guide us back to the right path.
I heard that in a car commercial.
You want something, you’ll have to crawl across the floor, use your damn teeth if you have to.
It’s alright. You fell like a champ.
Put good out in the world and good will come back to you.
We are gonna work those gimpy legs like a rented mule.
Cool story. Try telling it to someone who gives a sh*t.
You are wasting your time, old man. The last thing I need is another Sensei.
All that Miyagi-Do mumbo jumbo, that might score you points in a tournament. But now you’re in the real world kid, you might wanna learn to strike first.
That was a long time ago, Chozen has changed.
It’s not the same, chicks are hotter on the page.
Or you can just keep getting foot rubs from that pansy a** therapist.
This was where karate was born.
We are basically karate cousins.
Why don’t you be a good girl and grab us some of those bobbleheads?
China people, whatever.
Your Sensei did not teach you everything.
Defense takes on many forms.
The oly way to survive was to kill.
Sometimes you have no choice but to kill.
If your enemy insists on war, then you take away their ability to wage it.
This is our chance to fight back.
Where are you b*tch?
I hear there is a make a wish kid in the house tonight. Ladies let’s make that kids wish come true.
I’m about to save your business.
Little Daniel’s not man enough to fight his own battles anymore?
Hey Rambo. Kids are getting hurt.
You got a death wish, kid?
They got what they deserved for what they did to Miguel.
Your legs are still pu**ies.
Better fall that time.
Do you have any you are wearing a shirt, maybe?
We could fotomat it.
Let’s go, hotwheels.
You chipped my tooth, b*tch.
Get em, lip.
I never cared about Miyagi-Do or Kreese, I cared about us.
Were you just going out with me to get Sam’s attention?
I know you are helping your mom but you need help.
I just cleaned the blood off that mat. Oh well.
You let Kreese take your dojo. You let Hawk, Tori and everyone else think you’re weak.
What happened, you helped a bunch of people and then walked away like a pu**&.
That’s what I’ve been up to. That’s who I am. I’m a Sensei.
Atlast when you use to be a thorn in my tits, you were getting me an A in science.
So these are your friends now?
Sensei Kreese is turning them into an Amry of a**h*les.
What happened here at this school, it rocked me to my core.
You got soft and we paid the price.
When you came into my dojo, you were softer than a babies a**.
This is where I almost lost to fear.
Sam, you are the only one who can get up when you are down.
Cobras are strong. They may be the king of the jungle, but the world’s more than just a jungle. And there’s only one animal that can kill a snake.
Welcome to Eagle Fang karate.
You made your choice. And you are gonna regret it.
Eagles don’t get sh*t on. They are the ones doing the sh*&&ing.
Don’t forget, being a bada** doesn’t mean be an a**h*le.
If you have hate in your heart, then you have already lost.
They aren’t my friends anymore, not after what they did to you guys.
You said you would always be on my side.
Atleast I know who I am. You are still trying to be something you’re not.
I don’t need notes, I shoot from the hip.
You leave my daughter out of this you piece of sh*t.
This man has poisoned the mind of his students. I should know, I was one of them.
We want a place where we can compete, fairly and safely.
Sometimes the scars you can’t see are the ones that hurt the most.
I don’t know where I’d be today, or who I’d be today if it wasn’t for my Sensei.
Be careful what you wish for.
You two deserve eachother.
I have some plans.
Don’t let your guard down? Or too scared?
Sometimes the best defense is more offense.
Is that my drum in your pocket?
He put Miguel in the hospital. He is the enemy.
The enemy of your enemy, is your friend.
Sensei Kreese taught me, if you take all that hate and you channel it, it makes you stronger. And it feels good.
I don’t know what a mang dauhl bowl is, so how’s the cheeseburger?
I just don’t need to drink to pretend to be cool.
I’ve ruined every meaningful relationship I’ve ever had, starting with you.
Sensei was a rich kid?
We’re getting a little gift for Sensei.
If I don’t pass Trig this semester, my dad is going to sh*t in my mouth.
It was good talking to you, Miguel. From one All Valley champ to another.
This place makes me feel like I’m 17 again.
You are what Cobra Kai has been looking for.
They make a pretty good team.
This Christmas party is turning out to be Ho-Ho-Horrible.
You Parent Trapped us?
Cobra Kai is the bigger threat now, to all of us.
Alone we are nothing, but if we work together, we have a shot.
This rivalry has to stop, one way or another.
Why are you okay with anyone calling you penis breathe?
I can not wait to talk to you.
Have the man-boys filled you in on the whole “mortal enemy karate dojo battle for the soul of the Valley” thing?
Heard you are throwing a party, hope you don’t mind if we crash.
There is your side, and your side, and then there is the truth. And the truth is, you guys are more alike then you’ll admit.
We were so young, and the good times far outweighed the bad. And that is how I will always remember it.
Lets go home and get into some trouble.
Do you want to help me win this thing?
Thanks for the motivation.
You better watch your back.
Thanks for making me feel like a kid again.
What took you so long?
We won’t just dominate the tournament, we’ll melt this whole snowflake generation.
Sensei Kreese was right, I can’t be my own worst enemy. But you can be.
I thought there was still hope for you.
You wanted a fight you son-of-a-b*&^% now you got one.
Time for you and Miyagi to reunite.
Keep your Cobra Kai’s away from our kids.
Cobra Kai’s got to go, for good.
If we lose, I go.
We won’t lose.
Get out of here, all of you.