Netflix dropped its comedy special Dave Chappelle: The Closer today October 5th! I will have a review coming on my YouTube channel, so make sure to check it out! In the meantime, I wanted to list some of the best quotes from the special because Dave Chappelle always has the most profound thoughts to go along with his comedy. Check out this list of 25+ best Netflix’s Dave Chappelle: The Closer quotes.
If you enjoyed these Dave Chappelle: The Closer quotes, check out these other articles: There’s Someone Inside Your House movie quotes, Wolfboy And The Everything Factory quotes, Netflix’s MAID quotes, Squid Game quotes, Black As Night movie quotes, Bingo Hell movie quotes.
Dave Chappelle: The Closer Quotes
Before I start I want to say, I’m rich and famous.
I’m vaccinated, I got the Johnson & Johnson vaccine. I walked in and was like, give me the 3rd best option. I’ll have what the homeless people are having.
I haven’t felt that dirty in a long time.
I am the Magic Johnson of coronavirus.
Is it possible a gay person can be racist? Of course it is, look at Mike Pence.
Please Jesus, make these buttholes ugly to me.
I can’t help feel like if slaves had baby oil and booty shorts, we might have been free a hundred years sooner.
Gay people are minorities until they need to be white again.
I tenderized them t*tties like chicken cutlets.
I whooped the toxic masculinity out of that b*tch.
You gotta get off the bus and walk.
I want everyone to wear crochet p*ssy hats, that’ll show them.
I’m the one that got off the bus and left 50 million dollars on the bus and walked.
My pronoun game is not as nice as it is today.
Who know the white people that believed and Q and loved Trump. You know, like the Michigan white people.
What do you mean your people? Were they kidnapped from Transylvania and brought here as slaves?
I’ve never had a problem with transgender people, my problem has always been with white people.
It’s not blood, that is beet juice.
We didn’t know if it was a heckler or an active shooter.
She said sir, I don’t have carpets I have hardwood floors.
I believe you because it takes one to know one.
I don’t give a f*ck cause Twitter isn’t a real place.
Punching down on someone requires you to think less of him and I know him, and he doesn’t.
If you ever want to know about anything gay, call Anderson Cooper from CNN.
Empathy is not gay. Empathy is not black. Empathy is bi-sexual. It must go both ways.
Please do not abort DaBaby.
I am not telling another joke about you until we are both sure, that we are laughing together.